Friday 18 May 2018

PARKING FIRMS' TOP EXECUTIVES ENGAGE IN YET ANOTHER REVEALING PHONE CONVERSATION


- How are things ?
- Couldn't be better........it's amazing how so many motorists pay up without a whimper
- I know....I know.......why the other day we nailed a confused old man who drove into our
  car  park by mistake .......fannied around looking for an exit ......before eventually finding 
  one and leaving. Needless to say we banged him a ticket and the silly old fool paid up
  having never actually parked his car
- Well......beat this .....we issued a PCN to a guy who bought a ticket and displayed it  
  on the dashboard as instructed.......trouble was the hot sun caused the ticket to curl up so
  much so..... our rottweiler attendant... with an IQ well below 60..... couldn't read it. The 
  awkward bugger put in an appeal but our inside man at POPLA told him the fine still had 
  to be paid.....and hey presto a cheque for £100 was duly paid 
- The sucker
- The sap
- Yes we could go on for ages with these wonderful stories of how motorists get taken  
   for a ride........but I am worried about this new Parking Bill that could become law within 
   the year
- Don't worry .....parliament will still give us enough leeway to carry on screwing motorists
   left, right and centre. With parking spaces at a premium we can always resort to doubling
   the hourly charges....and let's face it by making motorists pay on entry based on their  
  wildly optimistic predictions of what time they might need.....there will be vast numbers of 
  overstayers who we can legitimately clobber. Moreover if we increase the number of  
  reserved and disabled bays many wlll choose to chance it believing the car parks to be  
  unmanned......it's like shhooting fish in a barrel
-  So good of you to reassure me
-  It's a pleasure
-  Going any way nice this year ?
-  Oh yes......just bought a million pound yacht to cruise around the mediterrean
-  Well .....have a good time....bye
-  Bye

   

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